#im not who i was 2 years ago
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R E V A M P
Hello my lovely readers! Usually before starting the next part of this series, I re-read all of Sunlight to get myself back into the swing of things. However! This time, I was absolutely struck by the fact that I utterly hated my own writing! In light of this discovery, I decided to do a revamp of all the chapters I don't particularly like. I will not be changing anything fundamental about the story, but I will be doing some extensive construction, as well as adding in some new details. I will post updates on my tumblr when a part is completely finished, for anyone looking to re-read the updated version. If you don't want to, that is 100% okay, the story will still make sense later on because I won't be changing any of the major plot points. That being said, Part 1 is officially redone and ready to go! Thank you for your patience and support, and enjoy!
#im sorry im a mess#ao3 fanfic#all i see is sunlight#demon slayer nezuko#fics by me#when you try your best but you don't succeed#(at containing your impossible self-expectations)#why did anyone read this the first time i lowkey hate it#im not who i was 2 years ago#in fact im much worse#but i also might be funnier#and slightly better at writing :p
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once more around the sun!! :3
#mine#cats#happy new year!!! a little late but alas#i didnt like th colours here but now i love them hehehehehheheh#i hope everyone had a good holidays life development for me is i now like ice hockey#in my sports fan era...these greasy sweaty bloody white men...intrigue me#also i got a new diary!! im using th hobonichi cousin in kinda alarmed by it ngl a5 is a lot of space to fill#i tried the hobonichi techo a couple years ago n found it a rlly weird size 2 work in but now.........big page scawwy#im trying not 2 b too insane about it . like relax who cares#if i do cute spreads i will share them :3#also in th same vein im not setting a book goal this year !! tbh i surpassed my goal last year by a lot and wasnt stressed about it at All#but i get so guilty about not reading sometimes like girl . guilty to who? god? are we catholic now? get a grip#anyway anway im going to toot on my flute and then eat my weight in mac n cheese#love how i had to get a new cork in my flute bc i didnt play for like 10 months n th guy was like play regularly! n i was like yeh will do!#and then did not do that#alas...time escapes me
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i want to know everything that makes you happy! 💫🪐🎇
#the caption is aioi lyrics but posting the same thing with the same caption on 3 different socmed is embarasisng. saki save me#project sekai#pjsk#prsk#proseka#saki tenma#leo/need#i have more chibis Soon just theyre for halloween so u have to wait a few days. sniles so wide#AIOI IS SUCH A GOOD SONG AND NOBODY FUCKING TALKS ABOUT IT IDGAF. ITS SO GOOD. START CRYING WITH ME#like obviously the mv is gorgeous and stunning andni love the event and cards but im talking sbout the song. Its so good#So is purpose and nobody talks about it either wtf guys HAPPY PURPOSE TUESDAY!!!!!!#pjsk radio in 6 hours who else is about to#explode MEEE MEEEE I AMMMMM machico save me#nene focus ohantom of Theopera PLEASE PLEAS EPLEASEPLEASE HOW MUST I MANIFEST.#i always mean to draw the songs i want wxs to cover ever since i only did 2 of them Half a fucking year ago but i keep forgetting#and then other groups cover the songs and im like Wlel i cant draw it now .. (i can) (i will still draw emukasa cat food)#mmjs cover is SO GOOD i love mmj all of their covers r so good. wasnt crazy abt their early game ones but All of them for the last 2 years#have been Bonkers. amen. minoshizu duet come back to us please god.#soo glad wxs got reincarnation apple and got all the parts i envisioned for them EMU IMLOVE YOUUUU#ok i gotta go i need to hot glue more fabric onto my cosplay boots before work tomorrow. love and peaches
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white chocolate
bonus:
image id under cut!;
[Image ID:
A digitally drawn comic of characters from the game Persona 4.
Image 1:
Yu Narukami on a couch, leaning towards a bowl on the table in front of him as he asks, "Oh, are there any pieces of white chocolate left? They're my favourite." Next to him, Rise Kujikawa has a hand on her chin as she looks at the bowl as well, though she says, "Mm... Looks like no..."
In the next panel, Chie, drinking from a can of soda, says, "The white chocolate? Didn't Hanamura take the last one just a second ago?"
Image 2:
The first panel shows Yosuke holding a wrapper as he pops something into his mouth, looking over. In the second, he lowers his hand and says, with his mouth still full of chocolate, "Oh, shit. Sorry, Partner."
Narukami waves him away quickly, saying, "No no no, it's not a big deal, don't worry. I mean, I don't mind!"
Yosuke mournfully says, "Well, but they're your favourite... Here."
Narukami insists, "Really don't worry about it-- wait what do you mean, 'here'."
Image 3:
Yosuke leans over the back of the couch, cupping Narukami's face in his hand as he kisses him to give him the chocolate in his mouth. To the left and right of Narukami, Yukiko and Rise are both taken aback, mouths wide open as they blush heavily.
Yosuke pulls back, putting a hand to his mouth as he licks his lips, saying in a somewhat teasing tone, "There you go, Partner. Like Satonaka said, it's the last one, so savour it, okay?"
A reverse shot shows the room completely flabbergasted: Narukami, Rise, Yukiko, and Naoto all are beet-red, staring at Yosuke in shock as he idly says, "Is it just me, or has that dumb bear been gone for way too long now? I'm gonna go check on him, he better not have broken anything," completely casual as if nothing had happened.
Image 4:
The bonus drawing shows Yosuke collapsed against the door of the room he just left, with a small note pointing to him that reads, "His knees gave out as soon as his brain caught up". He has his head in his hands, but is still visibly bright red, and screams at himself in his own head, "WHY THE FUCK DID I DO THAT."
In the same drawing, Kuma is shown to have been down the hall, confused as he calls out, "Yosuke? What's wrong?"
End ID.]
#if the girl who fed me an edible like this at a party 2 years ago is reading this i was the skinny dude in the acdc shirt#please call me im in love with you#persona 4#p4#yu narukami#yosuke hanamura#souji seta#souyo#comics#im a firm believer in yosuke rizz. i think hes naturally rlly charismatic#but hes over-aware of social things and so as soon as he tries he 'overcorrects' and seems really awkward#and he sees this and tries harder to be cool and only comes off even more awkwardly and etc etc#but once he stops thinking and being a try hard he turns into the most charming person in the room all of a sudden
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#a doodley#i had to make this blue so tumblr would stop hiding it from the dash#anyway no caption this happened 2 hrs ago#im happy abt my surgery but it and other things this year keep beinging conversations like these up#and i cant handle it at all.#everything my dad tells me just makes me feel worse and not bc its anything bad but bc I Feel Bad#like the conversation then continued to him being like no dont cry im just saying i wpuld have wanted to#quit my job decades ago and set aside money so I wouldnt be struggling as much now but that didnt happen#and i just dont want that to happen to you guys :)#so we have to support u so that your life is what u want it to be#and i cried even more bc what do u mean. thats so sad. ur a person and u were a child and baby once and ur gonna die#and you always almost cry when u talk about your mom who passed away decades ago#and your brothers that passed away#recently and im going to be your age and still sobbing bc i miss my dad. just like i have been prematurely crying about since i was 7#the other day my dad asked my mom if i cried a lot when i was a baby/kid and my mom said no and then my dad#said that when i Did cry it was so severe he thought i would ''drown in my own tears''#bc i could never stop. like. thats still true today. ive been crying on and off since then#i think i mentioned he's just been telling me stories about his life lately and it further fuels this. i get so sad. im sorry your life was#like this. i dont want to die i dont want you to die im sad im sorry im sorry#im scared. im never going to see you again. how horrible. how horrible#i cant enjoy my day today bc every day is a day closer and i get sad
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id fumble him so bad
#really really rushed but ill probably go back and clean these up tmrw anyway#i havent played stardew valley but ive been meaning to because i have a little crush on this guy ^_^ hes cute#idk why but smth about him is really endearing. like between him and sunburst i feel like theres a pattern here but idk what#i guess my type is boys that whimper#the last two images are based on a real conversation i had with my doctor a few years ago lol. deadass stared at me for a good 2 minutes#i wanna make a farmersona too...... if my minecraft gameplay is anything to go by id probably play with animals all day instead of#actually farming........ can i just do livestock in stardew.. i dont have a green thumb i managed to kill a succulent once......#actually idk if my computer is even strong enough to run steam but i dont wanna get it on my phone. maybe ill get the microsoft download#unless stardew has its own website like minecraft. i really dont know anything abt it so im going in blind from the start#my art#myart#doodles#puppysona#sona#sdv#sdv harvey#stardew valley#whats funny about this is i have a classmate who kinda looks like if brian david gilbert and harvey had a baby. i havent told him this
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Finally found someone who understands loumand amongst the loumand never loved eachother discourse, feel like I'm going crazy armand loved him (not defending his actions) and i believe louis loved him too in paris and i wanna say after too even if that love was tainted, or faded by the time they're in dubai that doesn't mean they never loved eachother.
They're beautiful and complex! I can't say I'm surprised they aren't a popular dynamic but the unwillingness to engage with their story is what upsets me the most. If you take away the love they share then absolutely nothing either of them do in those 77 years together never meant anything in the first place.
Honestly, the biggest crime of Anti-Loumand readings is that they are wildly boring. Like okay, Louis has absolutely no agency whatsoever, or he's staying with Armand for Claudia but he can't even do that right because he refuses to stand up for her where it actually matters, but also stays with Armand even when he tells him to get out of Paris to....spite Lestat??? And Armand is just....what? Blanket evil with no real motive but to keep Louis like a pathetic goldfish in an gallon tank. Why would you want that, when the story being written is much more interesting? Louis who is troubled yet still wanting, drawn to Armand and despite his reservations and self-doubt finding himself loving Armand despite it all. In each-other they both see something they want and believe they can obtain it if they can possess the other. Armand is dazzled continuously by Louis zest for life, even if he often times doesn't understand the forms it takes. I adore how they each have these pivotal moments where they are disarmed by the others vulnerability. Armand hearing Louis advocate for Claudia in the sewers and deciding not to kill him. Louis hearing Armand talk about his past and choosing to stay in Paris, despite the imminent dangers.
Like of course, they are far far far from perfect, and by Dubai they are both such shells of the people they actually are. And why I keep hope alive about Trinity Gate or really any loumand reunion. The two of them getting to meet again when they have both rediscovered themselves, and seeing each other in new lights would be everything to me. But yeah, truly nothing could make me hate them. I could sit here and wax poetic about them forever, frankly. And I absolutely will continue to on this blog lmaooo.
#char.txt#interview with the vampire#answered#remember like 2 months ago when i was like ''surely im not a loumand blog'' well girlie pop....#and ofc not everyone who doesnt like them together misunderstand the plotline#but you can really tell those people who get it and dont like it from the ones who watched the season with their eyes closed#anyway now that i have the font i should make a ''ask me about the 77 year union between the Vampires Armand & Louis De Pointe Du Lac''#but i dont have a cricut so idk more at 10 on that one
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chara deserves to break out of the game window and stretch their legs a little.
HD still beneath cut!
#undertale#chara undertale#chara dreemurr#floaty floaty floaty.. i love these gifs.#this is a redraw of smth from a loooong time ago for my old chara rp blog.#chara is a bug that never leaves my brain.#im binging undertale content 4 tha past 2 days. rn watching game grumps pacifist... before that shayys challenges :)#ppl say the fandom was toxic and idk i guess it was overwhelming at first cuz there were so many of us...#but the years passed and for the undertale fans who remain? i consider them all very gentle funny people#a lot of us grew up with this game. no matter how many years pass we'll always think fondly of it and watch/play from time 2 time...#and for those who are still DEEP in the trenches... i honestly consider it a green flag . you go girl !#i still need to get up 2 date on deltarune.... orz#qnyway#my nyart#i gave up on tha shading btws. ^_^
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hi.. i did some anatomy studies today.. and i turned them into headcanon art...Enjoy
#who was gonna tell me drawing abs is so fucking easy#UGHHHH#I COUDLVE DONE THIS 2 YEARS AGO#its so over im unstoppable now#genshin impact#genshin impact fanart#genshin#genshin fanart#diluc ragnvindr#childe tartaglia ajax#diluc fanart#childe fanart#chiluc
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if witcher 4 is set in the past, but in the recent past… in other words, the heyday of witchers… that would actually be way more interesting than setting it in the distant past, because we have so much more developed, canon context already for that period. there’s already a skeleton to hang a story on.
in addition to being able to bring back some already known characters. imagine meeting like, hen gedymdeith. what if we can know of tissaia training philippa as her pupil. meet eithné… uh… just the same as she ever was i guess, but with her daughter alive this time. encounter future scoia’tael agents as kids. i want to see falka on the stake
#that all is from various centuries and would have to span multiple centuries but im just saying examples#if that happens i will feel like marty mcfly#and… cdpr… 👉👈…#witcher contract quest where you meet regis but all you do is hold his hair while he vomits#and you know i’ve always wanted something like the oxenfurt drunk but set 200 years ago and with mah guy regis#and instead of killing him you sit down in the gutter with him and are like man you gotta change your life around#and he’s like i know 😭😭😭🩸🩸🩸#(the blood emojis are him covered in blood)#just consider: you could depict him with a younger hairline#the elbow-high diaries#omg i just cackled imagining regis doing the pose orianna did in the night to remember trailer#‘things like… me 😇?’#higher vampires in the witcher = good because when they commit crimes against humanity they tuck a hair behind their ear and giggle#[timed dialogue option UI] ‘and what do you think i am’ 1. a higher vampire… 2. to put it mildly a monster. a blood sucking fiend#3. a man who looks like he needs some help 😐#sorry. interesting thought about the witcher devolved into writing regis fanfiction in the tags. well many such cases on my blog
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First Previous Next
Askbox is open!
#splatoon#splatoon 2#splatoon 3#agent 4#agent 8#for anyone who remembers the og ata this arc is inspired by the talk comic#it took me a while to figure out how to address this topic#as someone who's dealt with sh in the past i dont think its talked about enough and this is actually what i wanted to do for liv years ago#but i was too scared to pursue it at the time#this whole thing was so hard for me to write and i hope im doing olivia justice. a lot of her thoughts are my own#if anyone is wondering why the scars arent there with her agent outfit - she wears flesh colored leggings to cover them
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Finishing more wips.
#hunter x hunter#hxh#feitan#phinks#hxh feitan#hxh phinks#i dont remember who requested me this in the server 2 years ago im sorry#hopefully u see this#phineas and ferbLOL#i hope that doesnt actually end up in the tag#my 2022 wips folder is shaking the way im completing these
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Cronus…. Colored.bass .. guitar …..
#If I had adult money it would be so joever#I make impulse purchases whenever I’m sad or stressed#cronus ampora#homestuck cronus#hs cronus#homestuck#home24uck#home2t4ck#Also im legally an adult (I’m 20) but since u become an adult at 18 im like technically 2 in adult years#When I get a big girl job I’m going to make so many poor financial decisions just you wait#bass guitar#esp guitars#ughhhh I love the color sm#Did you know purple used to be my favorite color from ages 0-high school#I stopped having a favorite color a while ago but purple’s coming back in full swing now#Thanks to you know who#(GEO Cronus)#God bless dalishthunder/pumpkinofthedale/chaussette_et_chaussures for making the best fanfic known to humankind#I’ll never emotionally recover from it
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I wake up in a cold
cold sweat, yeah
the blankets stuck to me like a second skin
staring at the cracks in the plaster
staring at the cracks in him
Every day every day every day he
pulls the same old shit, yeah
every day, every day I'm just tryin to survive and
he can't seem to let me live
I'm just
burnin up, burnin up, burnin up in here, it's
been too long, been too long, since you even gave a
glance in my direction and
even with the heat of flames I'm
freezing up in here with you
I'm freezing up because of you
its a long long day in hell when you deign to spend time with me
did you forget about us failed creations?
too busy breaking your prodigy
its just
another burn, another scar, another token of your love
another fracture, another way to prove you wrong
i promise you
you will regret
the day you wrote me off as
a failed creation, a first attempt
the "perfect successor: mark one"
im just
burnin up, burnin up, burnin up in here and
you havent noticed, you never notice, you never act like you even care
im burnin up, burnin up, burnin up and hey whats
with
these falling tears
you arent here
youre never here
why does it have to hurt so much?
its a cold time
cold time in hell when i came back to your door
the same reaction, the chain reaction
what was i expecting?
three years you havent changed one bit
the scars on his face reflect mine and
i am dead to you
the final chapter
i killed myself off but
it seems you survived ending
so hey lets dance
here in hell
lets keep going till the knockout bell yeah
let's watch this world burn together
the death of an age-old religion
i always believed less in gods
and more in kicking your fucking ass
im burnin up, burnin up, burnin up with you and
it feels good
to watch you burn
you finally get what you deserve.
youre burnin up, burnin up, burnin up out here
it brings a smile to my face
my skin burns as i watch you ache
i guess you really havent changed
i guess we'll never really change
i will just watch as you burn with rage
yeah, its just as freezing,
the heat of your flames.
Poem title: "freezing heat of flames". written 19 Jan 2023
#shoutout to this dabi song/poem i wrote like. almost 2 years ago#anyway i figure i want somewhere to put these so... why not tumblr?#its not like these will ever see anyone really yk??? like lets be so fr.#the way in which the tumblr algorithm works is unbeknownst to all. even those programmers who originally built it and the ones who continue#to do so...but also do programmers TRULY know what theyre building every time?? do anyone who works with code know. its just slamming the#keyboard iver and over until the computer understands aye#anyway so yeah im not worried about this getting numbers so im fine to post it lmao#mha#bnha#dabi#toya todoroki#touya todoroki#todoroki#poem#poetry
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eeeee part of a wip that i will never finish ever so here's the finished part of it
#brainstorm#i am never drawing like this again#transformers#tf brainstorm#back to lineart#how does rendering work#maccadams#no i dont know where the light source is#tf idw#mtmte#colors go brrrr tho#theres this one person here who has this dope rendered super vibrant style#and they do all the cyclonus and tailgate and galvatron (?) stuff#style somewhat inspired by that#the full wip is a lineup of MTO's#and their reflection is what they looked like during wartime#so there's like 7 other dudes that are just sketched out#but uncolored or half-colored#and its been many many hours (30 +) and i think its time to just let it go#fr tho i started this like a 2 years ago#its summer so im trying to finish my wips and i found this#but uh. im not finishing it#my art
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procrastination is starting to have its consequences finally
#on my friends living room floor they love together but one of them has been london for weeks or maybe months#to be with her love. im on a foam mattress from one of their beds next to a glass bottle of water opened by one of them#in a mug given to me by another. the weather felt like my childhood today and it also felt like 2 years ago.#(put space in the heavens Einstein's idea and hes your friend too so nothing to fear) around the table they drank and laughed and i thought#i hope you keep growing so full with the love you receive . i hope your appetite becomes insatiable from how used to it you are#and i know youre all leaving soon but i hope one day you miss this and that youll be happy you miss it#its worth missing i think#i thought he didnt care but he said after exams hes going walk around this area over and over#(this is near where he lived and where we visited almost daily for a year)#(hed come across the bridge on a lake)#we went where she used to live and at the entrance a fox sat calmly. it just yawned and stared.#it felt important somehow. i think maybe their impressions of me will never be close to how i feel inside but i think#i love them enough for that not to matter. i dont think theyll ever know this. i dont think if they did it would change much.#and seeing them smile makes my heart glow anyway. today i tried their malaysian tea the ginger burned my throat#they warmed my heart. hes going to canada soon and hes going to the US soon and shes going everywhere soon ill never understand#how were supposed to live with memories and with seperation and with the past but we do it anyway so i think it doesnt matter much#i wanted to write a poem for the lab rats with the fibre optic wires lit with blue forcing them to turn around and around#something about how im sorry that the two photon arrays burned the inside of your brain. im sorry about the sharp points of multielectrode#arrayes. im sorry about everything we do to you. she asked to see me tomorrow. im trying to have self control but i miss her so awfully#last night my friend talked to me and i updated on everything that happened with love and the lack of it and she just started laughing#and she told me about the same thing from her side. and she told me about how she loved london because she would walk the streets#and she felt like the people were her. and her eyes would go over the people and the bag of bagels and the construction men they probably#have a kid at home maybe shes a daughter. this kid is crying for her mother and the building you just walked past caused#blisters and pain and people died in it and very likely people were born in it. we talked for hours and i felt like#i was holding her hand just like that time she held mine watching a horror film. i love her so much#my friend is a genius and i remember her picking up the charms of my phone and staring at the leaf hanging from them. shes side stepping to#music drinking dangerous cider and cocktails from a movie and chit chatting with billionaires and undergrads#i love her dearly. his head covered in electrodes. she tells me about a syrian guy shes in love with and she says#what you feel and what i feel is like cocaine. ive tried a lot of fucking cocaine.#she says ive reminded her of what living actually feels like and to never put energy into someone who doesnt see me this way.
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